Author: CN Winters

Rated: PG

Genre: A little lighthearted romance and family comedy.

Author Note: This is part of the One-Shot Halloween Challenge. Thanks to Stephen Colbert and his report on the War on Halloween last night for a little inspiration in this one.

"Any good booty, Matey?" Olivia asked in a pirate voice that matched her costume.

Six-year-old Francesca, the butterfly, held open her bag as they walked the sidewalk of downtown Springfield.

"More yucky candy corn," she said frustrated.

"Your dad likes candy corn," Natalia said optimistically dressed in her witch costume.

"Dad has no taste," Francesca shot back.

"Outta the mouth of babes," Olivia muttered under her breath while Natalia giggled, "That’s not true."

"Yes it is," Francesca insisted. "He even likes liver and onions. See? No taste."

Natalia sighed. "Your dad loves you so I know he’s got great taste."

"Well, not when it comes to food. He’ll love half this bag because it’s gross candy corn. Who gives little packets of candy corn anyway?"

"Cheap people with no taste," Olivia replied, which earned her a light slap from her wife. "What? It’s true," she insisted.

Francesca reached into her bag and pulled out a book.

"It’s almost as bad as that crazy guy in white towel giving out these little bibles," she added and then tossed it back in with annoyance.

Natalia tried not to laugh. "He was wearing biblical robes, Sweetie. Like Jesus wore?" she said in a reminding tone.

"If that guy thinks he’s Jesus, I’d say he’s got the scariest house on the block!"

"Nailed it yet again," Olivia muttered once more while Natalia tried not to laugh.

"That’s not very nice to say," Natalia said.

"But it’s true, Ma. He shouldn’t be running around and acting like God. Do you think Reverend Peters would act like that?"

"No," Natalia answered honestly.

"Right, so why can’t that guy dress up in something fun and give candy like normal people?"

"Well, some Christians..." Natalia began.

"Aren’t cool like your Ma," Olivia piped in.

"I was going to say," Natalia stressed as she continued, "They feel Halloween is a satanic holiday. It’s designed to worship demons and evil things."

"No, it’s not! We don’t worship that stuff! We do stuff as a family even if you are a witch."

"Excuse me?" Natalia asked. Francesca just waved to her Ma’s outfit. "Oh, well, some people do worship demons and evil things at Halloween," Natalia replied.

"Like who?" Francesca asked.

"Well..."

Olivia laughed. "You can’t name one, can you?"

"I’m sure there’s someone," Natalia replied.

"Reva!" Olivia said.

"I know you’ve had issues, but I don’t think she’s a devil worshipper," Natalia said. She then watched as Francesca broke into a run toward eight-year-old Collin. "Oh, you mean you SAW Reva; not that she was..."

"Evil?" Olivia offered. "Oh, I’d never say that about good ole Reva Shane- Lewis," she said sarcastically.

"Behave," Natalia warned her.

They approached Reva, who was also dressed like a witch. At the moment, Collin, aka Superman, and Francesca were comparing treats. Olivia grinned as she got closer.

"Those are some cool false teeth, Reva. Pretty scary."

Reva looked annoyed, but then smiled. She didn’t let Olivia bait her. Instead, she calmly said, "I’m not wearing fake teeth, Olivia."

"Oops, my mistake," Olivia said smugly.

Reva looked like she was considering a retort, but she let it go and faced Natalia instead with a genuine smile.

"So, how are you, Natalia? I’m sure you have your work cut out for you with this one," she as she motioned to Olivia.

"There are days," Natalia admitted and then chuckled. Still, she hooked her arm around Olivia’s affectionately. "But I wouldn’t trade her. How’s Josh doing?"

"Good. Still in Central America, but coming home soon."

"Mom, we’re missing houses!" Collin said like he was playing beat the clock.

"Oh, fine," she told him. "Are you heading to Company later?" she asked the Spencer-Rivera trio.

"Yep. Emma’s meeting us there," Natalia said with a nod.

"Okay, we might see you again then. If not, Happy Halloween."

"Same to you two," Natalia said as she ruffled Collin’s hair.

"Olivia," Reva said a bit too politely to be really sincere.

"Reva," she returned in exactly the same tone.

After Reva and Collin walked to the next house, Natalia shook her head.

"I’ll never understand why you just can’t let things go with her. Is this still about Josh because if you’re still carrying a torch-."

Olivia nuzzled into Natalia’s ear. "Honey, I burn for one person now – you. And you totally rock that witch costume more than Reva ever could."

"You think so?" Natalia asked suggestively.

"I know so," Olivia said decidedly.

"Then let me cast a spell on you so you can explain this whole Reva thing."

Olivia groaned. "You’re killing my arousal level with all this Reva talk."

Natalia giggled. "Tell me why you hate her."

Olivia sighed. "I don’t hate her. You have to see it for what it is. Reva will forever be my... frienemy."

"Frienemy?"

"Has she made my life hell at times? You bet. When I really needed someone, has she been there to watch my back? You bet. I gave up trying to understand it a long time ago. I’d suggest you do the same."

Francesca began to walk past a house and Olivia motioned as she spoke, "Hey, Lollipop," she called out. "You’re missing this one."

"Collin warned me... Just more candy corn."

She quickly made her way to the next house. Natalia and Olivia just grinned at her ingenuity and time management skills.

About an hour later, the porch lights were now out and jack o’ lanterns had been extinguished. Trick or treating came to a close, so they made their way up the steps to Company.

"Can I ask something?" Francesca asked. "Why wasn’t Dad out here walking around? We’re doing all the work and he gets half the goodies?"

"Well, charge him a $.20 handling fee on any candy piece he takes."

"Olivia," Natalia groaned.

"No, hear me out," she said as she had Francesca’s full attention. "You charge him and then use that money to buy something you want. He doesn’t get free candy and you end up getting the candy you want at the store."

"That’s smart!" Francesca said.

"That’s extortion," Natalia added.

"No, that’s business!" Olivia countered them both. "The exchange of goods and/or services for cash. Capitalism at it’s finest. So, before you let Pop reach in the bag, you let him know the rules and you let no candy out of your sight until he pays. Got it?"

"Got it!" Francesca replied.

"You’re creating a monster," Natalia giggled.

"Monster. Heir. Call it what you will." Olivia shrugged as she led her girls inside.

Once there, they found a small group of people, including sixteen-year Emma, elbow deep in pumpkin guts.

"What in the world?" Natalia asked.

Emma sighed. "Buzz is baking pumpkin seeds so we have to pick them out of all this... shiiiii-stuff. I’m going on record to say this is gross beyond measure."

Olivia smiled and leaned over to kiss Emma on the temple. "How’d the party go with your friends? Is the farmhouse still standing?"

She grinned. "Yes," she told her mom. "And we only had two trick-or-treaters so the rest of the candy bag is ours little sis," she added conspiratorially to Francesca.

"Woohoo!" Francesca said.

"Did I hear a butterfly with a bag of candy say, ‘WooHoo’ out here," Frank said as he came out from the kitchen. Francesca dropped the bag and ran to Frank, who lifted her into a hug. "Did you get lots of candy?" he asked.

"Yep!" she told him. "And candy corn too, but if you want them there will be a small handle fee."

"Handling," Olivia whispered in her ear.

"Sorry, handling fee," Francesca corrected herself as Olivia smiled.

"Why do I get the impression your Mom has something to do with this?" Frank asked as he looked over to Olivia.

Olivia raised her hands in an ‘it wasn’t me’ fashion.

"Because it’s her idea," Francesca said with no pretense.

The small group around them laughed.

"So what’s the price?" Frank asked. "A college education someday?"

"Nope, it’s only $.25 and it goes to the Francesca Spencer-Rivera Fund for Candy Worth Eating."

"Is that so?" Frank asked with a laugh.

"I thought I said $.20," Olivia told her.

"The price went up," Francesca replied. "He looks like he really wants candy," she said in a softer voice.

Once more, everyone in the circle laughed.

"Ah, she’s already understanding supply and demand," Olivia gushed. "That’s my girl!"