Title: Virgin Sacrifice

Author: CN Winters

Fandom: Buffy fanfiction, Willow fanfiction, Buffy slash fanfiction, Willow Kennedy Fanfiction

Disclaimers: Joss owns 'em. I'm just using them for my sick, twisted purposes

Pairing: Willow/Kennedy

Feedback: Yes please - cnwinters71@yahoo.com

Rating: NC-17. Not quite yet but it will get there soon enough.

Summary: This is a 'choose your own adventure' story. I had different endings in mind so whatever path you take will lead you to a different outcome. Those of you unfamiliar with 'choose your own adventure' will understand when you reach the bottom of part one.

Willow quickly looked back at the book avoiding Kennedy's gaze. "I don't know," she said softly. "We'll see if we can find something else."

"Oh come on Willow. I'm willing to take one for the good of the team," Kennedy teased.

Willow closed the book and faced Kennedy. "You don't believe in magic and that's fine. But I realize what this could mean. Of course there was a time not long ago when I-I wouldn't care but…you have to understand Kennedy - not only is this spell life threatening but…"

"But what?"

"Your first time should be special, something that happens because it's you a-and you alone...not some Wicca spell," Willow grinned warmly before turning serious again. "It's a big responsibility…all of it."

"I trust you with that responsibility Willow. I do."

"Come on," she added, handing two of the books to Kennedy before picking up two more and blowing out the candle. "Let's take these back to the house and look them over a bit more. I can't say yes or no until I know for sure what it all entails. Agreed?"

"You got it Sugar."

Willow grinned at the endearment.

One night a make-out session was getting close to the point of no return when Kennedy called her Baby. That's all it took and Willow's entire body went rigid. Willow spent the next five minutes telling Kennedy it was an endearment that Tara used and although she cared for Kennedy and she loved their alone time and she enjoyed everything and, and and…it bothered her on some level.

After the long-winded appraisal of why the term was 'off limits' Kennedy opted for Sugar since, as she explained, it fit perfectly because Willow was sweet and tasty. Willow couldn't hide her blush and agreed she could live with it as long as she swore Kennedy she'd never tell the story of her new nickname to anyone, especially Xander who took great pleasure in teasing her.

Willow pulled her mind back from the memory and ran the back of her fingertips across Kennedy's face. "You're pretty sweet too ya know?" she added before blowing out the candle and grabbing an armful of books.

"Yeah well don't let it get around. I gotta reputation as a hard ass to protect."

Willow gave a lecherous chuckle.

"Please," Kennedy begged. "Don’t compliment my ass. I might be forced to pin you against the bookshelf and we might not get outta here anytime soon. Might also blow that virgin thing all to hell in the process."

XXXXX

When they walked in the Summers house they found all the S.I.T.'s talking in a circle.

"Rona?" Vi asked. "No way!"

"Yeah shocking I know," Rona chuckled.

"What's shocking?" Kennedy asked as she walked over to the group. Willow closed the door and followed behind her.

"She's graduated already," Vi added. "And she's only 16!"

"I tested out," Rona shrugged.

"No kidding?" Willow asked. "I was going to test out too but Xander begged a-and he did a fair amount of pleaded for me not to. He told me that if he had to endure the pain of high school so did I."

"So you stayed in school for the Xan man?" Rona asked with a grin.

Willow chuckled at her equation of Xander. "Yeah I did. But I don't regret it. If I'd left I wouldn't have met Buffy. A-and it's kinda lame having your mom drive you to college because you don't have a license you know? So I waited."

"So we've got two big brains in the house," Molly added.

"We should have them play Jeopardy some night," Amanda added. "You know put them up in front of a podium and ask them questions to see who the smartest one is?"

"That would be cool," Vi replied. The group of young women started to chatter excitedly about the idea with the exception of Rona.

"I'm not gonna enter a big brain competition against Willow," Rona replied.

"What's wrong? No guts?" Willow prodded.

Rona moved to her feet. "Are you challengin' me? Because that sounds like a challenge."

"Maybe I am," Willow grinned.

Rona considered it and started to nod. "Okay. You name the time and the place."

"A week from today. Right here. The girls can put the questions together but no cheating. They can't give you the answers and you can't ask. Agreed?"

"That goes for her too," Rona pointed to Kennedy. "No midnight confessions during pillow talk."

The group got a kick out of that and offered a few of their own teasing remarks.

"Absolutely. On the level and up 'n' up," Willow told her.

Rona offered her pinky in 'swear' and Willow took it in hers.

"You're on." Rona nodded confidently.

Buffy walked in and caught the tail end of the conversation. "What's going on?"

"Willow's gonna wipe the floor with Rona in a knowledge test AKA Jeopardy style," Amanda told her.

"I highly doubt that," Molly offered. "I'd stake my wager on Rona."

"Wanna put your money where you're mouth is?" Amanda teased.

The group then began placing bets and Buffy took Willow by the arm. "I need to speak to you alone," she told her in a disapproving tone.

Willow handed her books over to Kennedy even as Buffy pulled her along, making the brunette try her best to balance them as she moved.

"What's wrong?" Willow asked once she and Buffy were alone in the kitchen.

"What the Hell are you doing?"

"What'da mean?"

"I don't think now's the time to invite Alex Trebeck over."

"We'll get Xander to play Alex. You know? Put a fake mustache on him. Have him try to hide a Canadian accent and act more intelligent than he really is." Willow grinned, hoping a bit of levity might improve Buffy's mood.

Buffy was still failing to see the humor and stood stone-faced, arms folded across her chest.

"Oh come on Buffy," Willow sighed. "It's just a way for them to blow off a little steam and not focus on the impeding doom every moment of the day. Besides, it's educational too. They'll learn things when they look up the questions like the capital of Cuba and stuff.…Havana by the way. So, see? Double goodness."

"We are facing an apocalypse in case you forgot-."

"No. I haven't," Willow said cutting her off, feeling her own anger rise. "A-and it's not like we haven't faced apocalypses before. The difference this time around is you seem to have forgotten about why we fight them."

"Oh really?"

"Really," Willow countered. "We do it because life is worth living. We do it because life can be fun. A-and if you don't stop and take time to enjoy things life has to offer then you end up…." Willow stopped herself wanting to find the right words

"You end up what?" Buffy asked, her frustration evident in her voice. Willow knew there was no way to sugar coat it. Buffy's attitude pushed her too far.

"Like you!" the Wiccan spat out.

Buffy's expression fell and Willow instantly regretted the way it came out.

"I love you Buffy. You know that, right? So I gotta say this…You don't have fun anymore. There was a time when you could save the world a-and smile but now..." Willow paused, taking a moment to formulate her thoughts. "When's the last time you smiled? Really smiled and meant it? If you have recently, I haven't seen it. To be honest I haven't seen it since I screwed up and ripped you out of heaven. I'm sure it was a great place 'n' all but there's things down here to enjoy too like your friends and your family. Yeah I melted down and forgot about that after Tara died but I've been putting things back together and I know what's important."

Buffy began to reply but Willow held up a finger as she continued.

"You don't like the game show idea and that's fine. Point taken. But I'm gonna take the time to talk to these girls, to share a few laughs a-and yeah I might lose some of them… but you know what? I still plan to get involved and get to know them."

"Yeah some more than others," Buffy muttered.

Willow sighed and began to shake her head. "That was cheap shot."

"I didn't mean it," Buffy said a bit louder.

"Yes you did," Willow answered. "I'd just like to know why. Obviously my relationship with Kennedy is a problem with you. Is it the age thing? Because she's only two years younger than us and-."

"Just forget it Will," Buffy said starting to leave. She didn't get far. Willow snaked her arm out and turned her back around.

"No. I'm done 'forgetting' things with you Buffy. I'm done letting things go or watching you stalk off to be alone. You're the fearless leader here but you're still a damn shadow to everyone. Grant it those girls don't see it because they don't know you but I do…Or at least I did. So no more forgetting."

"What do you want me to say?"

Willow paused to regroup her thoughts. "For starters, tell me why a 'game show' is such a big deal?"

"It's not. I just over reacted," Buffy answered, trying to move away again.

The answer however didn't satisfy Willow and once again she stopped her. "Nah ah. I want to know why."

Buffy's arms refolded to her chest but Willow reached out and pulled them away. At first Buffy looked angry.

"Stop touching me," she warned.

Willow refused to look away at the attempted intimidation. The longer she stood there just watching her best friend in silence the more nervous Buffy began to look. It was too much. Willow could tell Buffy was on the verge of saying something but unable to make a sound. Not opting to wait any longer, Willow pulled Buffy into an embrace and much to both of their surprise Buffy began to sob. It wasn't loud but Willow could feel the Slayers shoulders rising and falling and instinctively Willow tightened her hold.

"Shh," Willow said as she began to rock her. "It's okay. Take your time."

The Wiccan began to run her palm over the back of Buffy's head repeatedly, trying to sooth her. She started to cry even harder and her arms gripped the Wiccan even more.

"I feel like I'm running on empty here," Buffy managed to squeak out.

"I know," Willow told her. "Been there myself."

"I need help but . . ."

"Don't know what to ask for or even who to ask?"

Buffy pulled back and started to grin as she wiped the tears from her eyes. "It's scary how you still do that – know what I'm trying to say even if I don't."

Oh yeah? Xander says this is scarier, Willow answered calling with her mind to Buffy.

Buffy gave a light chuckle. "That is a bit spookier I'll admit," she said out loud.

Willow grinned and ran her hand down Buffy's arm before stopping and interlocking her fingers with Buffy. She was a bit relieved when she felt Buffy tighten her grasp too.

"You're the fearless leader Buffy but it's okay to be scared…well maybe not in front of them," she admitted with a comforting grin. "But you can let your guard down with us. You know? Me, Xander, Giles. None of us would think any less of you. A-and didn't Giles tell you once that the best way to be strong and be an adult is to ask for help when you need it?"

Buffy nodded.

"It's just a game to take their minds off the doom for a little while. It'll be entertaining, maybe a few laughs. All good I assure you. A-and much needed…I can still use a few smiles too ya know? Just because Kennedy is in my life doesn't mean that things are rosy. Having her here helps but…I still miss her Buffy. I'll miss her until the day I die."

Buffy knew who 'her' was and didn't need an explanation.

"I know you do Will. I miss her too. Even after you guys broke up I still talked to her. And it wasn't until you left for England that it really hit me that she was gone...So I miss her, if it's worth anything."

"It is. I'm glad to know she touched your life too," Willow nodded. "But I think you do have some problem with Kennedy and I think you should tell me what it is…Maybe you can't pin point it exactly but-."

"Oh I know." Buffy grinned, feeling a bit nervous.

"Well then what-."

"You were mine. But now you're hers."

Willow could almost feel her jaw drop and she began to stammer for a starting place. At first Buffy wasn't sure what brought on the reaction then she realized the way it must have sounded.

"No. I said that all wrong," Buffy replied quickly, holding her hands in front of her, trying desperately to correct her point. "I mean…You're my big gun Will; my witch. I'm your slayer. And now…if it came down to a choice…which slayer would you choose? I feel like I'm not 'your Slayer' anymore. She is and…okay, I know she's not a Slayer yet and I'm not 'totally yours' because the only sleeping we've done together has been in a platonic 'no naughty touching' nature. And damn I need to take breath in here someplace." Buffy paused but held her hands up so Willow would let her continue. "Look…I'm petty, okay? I'm petty and small and jealous. But not in a sexy jealous way," she added quickly. "I'm not talking cuddles…or more than cuddles…but I mean in a…"

"You're insecure because I have a 'back up' slayer in my life?"

"Exactly," Buffy sighed, relieved that Willow understood what she struggled to get out.

"I know how you feel. I felt the same when Faith showed up. You didn't need me anymore. Well, not until she went all crazy and homicidal but that's not the point," Willow said shaking her head. "The point is this: You'll always be my Slayer Buffy. Just like Tara will always be my girl…But I think I've got room for Kennedy in my heart too. The more I see of her, the more I like."

Willow watched the playful smirk come to Buffy's face.

"Hey! No dirty thoughts," Willow warned, waving her finger. "I mean I like HER. And not having to explain the whole scoobies scene or leading a 'double life' is a big bonus I might add," she said with a chuckle. "I love you all but for different reasons. So don't worry okay?"

Buffy smiled. "Kennedy's lucky to have you Will. And so am I…Don't forget that okay?"

"I won't as long as you don't forget that I'm around. You can come to me and not keep things bottled up like this. Deal?" she said holding out her hand to shake.

Buffy gently pushed the hand away and hugged Willow instead. "Deal," she said softly.

"So ya gonna root for me?" Willow asked optimistically. "In the big game?"

"I'll lead the Willow section. Kennedy just better not get in my way."

"Buffy," Willow chastised.

"What? I admitted I was petty. I'm possessive too ya know? If anyone gets to lead the big gun cheering squad it's me. Plus, I have experience I might add."

Willow chuckled as she led Buffy back to the dinning room. "I'll warn her in advance. You called dibs on head cheerleader first," she whispered.

Chapter 4

"Anything yet?" Kennedy asked as she thumbed through one of the books they had returned.

"This spell is pretty advanced but…"

"But what?" Kennedy asked.

"It's doable. A-and it is dangerous. Few have managed to complete it."

"Any reason as to why?"

"Well yeah…Listen to this..." Willow began to read as Kennedy listened taking it all in. It did sound difficult but not impossible and she knew if Willow decided she could do it then Kennedy had every faith that she could.

XXXXX

Willow rushed around the house trying to find her book bag as she called up the stairs. "Hurry up Dawn. You're gonna be late for school."

"It's not my fault Vi went over her shower time," Dawn yelled downstairs. "I've gotta dry my hair."

Willow rolled her eyes. "Just braid it and come on."

Kennedy leaned on the wall near the staircase watching her girlfriend riffle through duffle bags, coats and a host of other items.

"Ah Ha!" she heard Willow exclaiming pulling her book bag out. "I think WE need a house with wings."

"Ship all us potentials out there huh?" Kennedy offered.

"Not all the potentials," Willow grinned lecherously. "Actually I was thinking we could live in the wing and give everyone else the rest of the house."

"Now there's an idea," Kennedy grinned.

Dawn still hadn't surfaced yet so Willow yelled up again as she went to the front door. "I'm opening the door now! I'm leaving!" Willow went to step out but the sight in front of her stopped her cold. "Oh my God," she muttered.

Kennedy walked around to see what had turned Willow a ghostly white. As the redhead started to collapse, Kennedy caught her and softened her descent. She shouted up the stairs in near panic.

"Buffy! Come quick!"

Kennedy looked toward the porch. She'd seen the pictures. She knew the face.

"Tara?" Kennedy asked.

The blonde nodded and reached out to touch Willow's limp body but Kennedy smacked her hand away. In that instant Kennedy realized something. She'd smacked her hand away. She was solid.

She was real and not the first. Kennedy wasn't sure if she felt uneasiness or relief. Either way, she figured it couldn't be good.

"Who are you?" they both asked in unison.

XXXXX

"So the last thing you remember, you were at your dorm, correct?" Giles asked.

Tara nodded from across the dining room table where nearly everyone was gathered with the exception of Willow who was still passed out on the sofa and Kennedy and Dawn who tried to rouse her.

"Yes. I walked into the hall to go to the soda machine and when I got back it wasn't my room. I mean none of my things were there. It was like it was entirely someone else's room so I went over to Will's dorm and when I got there another girl answered and said she'd been there for nearly a year and she didn't have a roommate named Willow."

"Then what?" Buffy asked.

"Well of course I went to your place Giles. The guy there told me the man that rented the place before him had moved back to England according to the landlord…but that was about a year before. He offered to try to contact his landlord but I passed…So the next place I hit was the Magic Box but it's all boarded up and condemned. Finally, I came here to your place," she told Buffy. "Maybe you or Dawn or your mom might be here."

At that moment Dawn walked into the dining room. "Kennedy says the smelling salts aren't working," she told the group. "Willow's still out cold."

"What's going on here?" Tara asked. "Why is Will passed out and why is an entire year of my life gone from existence? I mean…have any of you seen me recently?"

The scoobies and Giles shifted uncomfortable unsure of what to say or even how to explain it.

"It's been sometime since we've seen you but obviously you've seen us as recent as yesterday," Giles began when no one else did. "Perhaps you can tell us more about your experience so far this morning. Is there anything else you can remember?"

"The Bronze is in the wrong spot," Tara told him after a brief consideration.

"Pardon me?" Giles asked.

"The club? The Bronze? It's on the other side of the street entirely. Oh! And Andy's service station doesn't exist. There's a place called Blackbeard's Fish and Chips there instead. I mean it looks like Sunnydale. It feels like Sunnydale but…"

"It's not your Sunnydale," Giles finished.

"But it has to be," Tara insisted. "I know all of you and you all know me."

"A linear dimension," Anya muttered.

"What?" Buffy asked.

"It sounds like a linear dimension," Anya told them. "This 'world'," she said motioning around the room, "it's just one reality."

"Of perhaps thousands, maybe even millions of others," Giles offered as Anya nodded.

"Exactly," Anya told him. "She must be from another dimension. Not the Tara we know or that knows us but the resemblance between both lines is well…freaky. So is Willow your lover?"

"Anya!" Buffy remarked at the tactless question.

"I'm just curious as to how much is in common between worlds," Anya shrugged.

"No, that's okay. She's my lover. Well was my lover I guess. This is all pretty confusing." 

"Did Xander marry me?" the ex-demon asked next.

"Anya," Buffy began. "I swear to God-."

"I'd just like to know if there's another me out there that isn't miserable. Is that so wrong?"

"Right now yes because this isn't about you."

"Really it's okay," Tara told Buffy. "Maybe the more I answer the more we can figure out what's happened...And no you haven't married. You're both engaged though."

"Yep," Anya nodded. "Sounds like a linear dimension alright."

Buffy computed the information. "Well how did she get here?"

Anya examined Tara for a moment. "Beats me," Anya shrugged.

"Tara," Giles began. "Does your Sunnydale have a Slayer? Do you even know what a slayer is?"

Tara grinned. "Of course I know what a slayer is. You above all people should know that Giles? But the question is do all of you?"

"I'm the Slayer," Buffy answered.

Tara started to laugh. "You've got to be kidding me. This can't be my world. You?"

"Yeah me," Buffy said indignant. "Whose your Slayer?"

Tara grinned. "I am."

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